I have a rather sad confession.
After the Etape du Tour last weekend, I had a massage. And during this wonderful moment, of all the things I could have been thinking about, my mind wandered to the sensual art of coaching.
It happened like this.
My masseuse asked me where I wanted to be massaged and I said the legs, lower back and neck. This seemed to make sense for my bicycling pains. Anyway, she listened, gently adjusted my position and got straight to work.
She did the feet a bit, back, lower back and then to my surprise, went deep into my buttocks. In that instant, in that moment of searing pain, it was clear to me that this was where I needed her professional hands.
And so I thought, how interesting (and this is the sad bit) this is just like coaching. I suddenly saw the light like Paul on his way to Damascus.
When asked what I wanted to focus on, I offered my safe, obvious presenting issue - the legs and back. But actually, the source of all my various pains was largely in the glutes.
So why didn’t I just say “work on my buttocks”. Because, for me, this area was very personal and I needed to trust this person before I allowed her to go there. Also, the symptoms were easier to identify than the source. Such is the case with coaching. Rarely will a client come forward or even know how to come forward with the real source of where they need help - because it may be deeply private or deeply hidden. Perhaps both.
So for coaches, make sure you get working on your client’s buttocks and not waste your time rubbing their calves however delightful this may be.
And for clients, make sure you have the courage to work in places that feel a bit risky; these are the areas that can really help you.
Something Practical
Stay with me here. This is a serious suggestion. Treat yourself to a massage. When was the last time you did something like this.
What if I was to tell you that, after a massage, you will have a whole range of ideas that will solve some your pressing issues and that these can only emerge when:
* you stop doing things
* you let someone take care of you
* you create dissonance - by having an unusual experience
* you relax, completely
Out of interest. Notice your reaction to this suggestion - to what degree are you saying nice idea but no time, no money, too indulgent, don’t need it.
Something New
In September, the family and I will be moving back to London.
Because It’s There will be working with the senior leadership teams in various NGOs and Charities. These are challenging times for business. Even more so for this sector.
On our return, we are looking to have as many conversations as possible with the following types of organization:
Status: NGO, Not-for-profit, Charities
People: 10 to 30 employees
Financial: handling 5m to 50m
Focus: Environment, Humanitarian
If you fit this description, please do pass on your contact details. We'd love to hear from you.
We promise to go easy on your buttocks.
